On Friday, I received a letter in the mail from Lawrence University informing me that I was put on their waiting list. I was really upset at first- the school was my first choice and I have been dreaming about going there for a little less than a year. The school felt like home and that's something my other choices were lacking.
I have had a lot of advice thrown my way in the past few days. Among the best I've gotten:
♥ "You have to trust that even though you may not be going down the road you had hoped that does not mean that is the wrong one"
♥ "I think you already gave yourself the best advice: 'I have no idea which way to turn other than to God.' "
♥ "All good things are not lost. "
and then of course there's:
♥ "If you ever want to burn college brocheures or something, I am totally up for it"
One of my friends gave me something more than just words- he showed me something I needed to see in the moment, and it was one of the things that made me want to start this. It's a video of a man named Randy Pausch, who I have heard of but never looked into.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=_b0CJfRU1CM
After seeing the video I did a little more research:
http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~robins/Randy/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Pausch
I think that trying what he has to say will help me figure out who I want to be, starting from the ground up.
If you are reading this and like what you see/hear, please contact me. I'd be more than happy to add you as an administrator of this blog.
In love,
Lauren
Monday, March 24, 2008
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Now We Begin
Although as of now, the We is an I.
I created this blog on an impulse- but a strong one. There are things I've always wanted to do with my life. Some silly, some serious. I want to do more with my life to make sure that these things happen, and I hope to discover more about myself along the way.
I believe that parts of who we are are engraved in us, like initials into a park bench. I also believe there are parts that change, parts that develop with time, experience and inspiration. My mission in life, as of now, is to keep steadfast to the engraved things (things like my morals) and to open my arms wide to the change I am most often afraid of and allow The wind to take me where I need to go.
It is my hope that more people will join this blog- people I know, people I don't, so this can become a community of sorts. A place where we can share life goals, ideas, thoughts and dreams and encourage each other as best we can. So I suppose that this is an open invitation to you, reader, to comment and join me in this journey.
It's funny, not having any idea how to start a project like this. Maybe a list of things I want to do sometime soon?
- Start a youth prayer group at church
We have a youth program, yes, but it is...not strong. Our Catechism teacher is very set in his ways and I worry that he will push away more Catholic youth than pull closer. Just having a group of people to pray with and talk to would be nice. I may be leaving my town for college soon, but it would be nice to leave that behind.
-Record a "Demo"
I wanted to be famous when I was 12. I tried writing music and now I laugh. Over the years I've taken it more seriously and really want to have something to look back on, so I don't forget what I've written. Thus far, I have 3 fully accompanied songs written, 2 unaccompanied and 1 that's half written. I should do it now, when I have the opportunity.
-Finish "White Houses"
I've been writing "White Houses", a novel of sorts, for 2 years. It's someone's story, somewhere. I feel like I need to tell it and get it out there so people know.
-Pick a College
(haha)
-Become More Independant
When you are with someone for 1 year, 7 months and 9 days, you forget what it's like to make decisions for ONLY you. Now that I'm back to that, I need to DO it. As difficult as the journey will be, I need to learn how to define myself without someone else's name attatched.
-Find Truth and Be Truthful
We all waste so much time beating around the bush. There is such a lack of authenticity in society- from the fake "Wow, I thought you were sisters" my mother and I get at the grocery store, to the "I'm real sorry about your news about being waitlisted at your dream school- i guess you can come to Eau Claire with me now!" Without sacrificing tact, I want to be honest with people and find truth in my life.
-Serve God
I am having trouble finding friends who believe- I have a lot of agnostic friends, which is ok for them. I respect their choice to live that way. In certain groups I feel uncomfortable talking about my faith, and in others I feel like they expect me to prove my faith. I don't want to feel like I have to prove anything to anyone except God. My relationship with Him is SO personal. I just want to find support- someone to say "Go Get 'Em!" I suppose I can find it in you, unknown reader, and hope that you DO exist. Whoever joins this blog, if someone does, doesn't have to be religious. It's just a goal in my life to be a stronger follower of Jesus Christ- to pray, listen and do what He asks of me. Right now, this is the most important thing in my life.
So that's my list, for now. There will probably be a lot of "note to self" additions to the list along the way, but hopefully, my list won't be the only one. Please, don't leave me hanging here people.
In love-
~Lauren
(In case anyone was wondering, the name of the Blog has an interesting story. It's the name of a story in a book I used to read when I was little - one of the first books that I ever learned how to read. I guess the title fit the purpose of this blog as well as acting as something that has value to me)
I created this blog on an impulse- but a strong one. There are things I've always wanted to do with my life. Some silly, some serious. I want to do more with my life to make sure that these things happen, and I hope to discover more about myself along the way.
I believe that parts of who we are are engraved in us, like initials into a park bench. I also believe there are parts that change, parts that develop with time, experience and inspiration. My mission in life, as of now, is to keep steadfast to the engraved things (things like my morals) and to open my arms wide to the change I am most often afraid of and allow The wind to take me where I need to go.
It is my hope that more people will join this blog- people I know, people I don't, so this can become a community of sorts. A place where we can share life goals, ideas, thoughts and dreams and encourage each other as best we can. So I suppose that this is an open invitation to you, reader, to comment and join me in this journey.
It's funny, not having any idea how to start a project like this. Maybe a list of things I want to do sometime soon?
- Start a youth prayer group at church
We have a youth program, yes, but it is...not strong. Our Catechism teacher is very set in his ways and I worry that he will push away more Catholic youth than pull closer. Just having a group of people to pray with and talk to would be nice. I may be leaving my town for college soon, but it would be nice to leave that behind.
-Record a "Demo"
I wanted to be famous when I was 12. I tried writing music and now I laugh. Over the years I've taken it more seriously and really want to have something to look back on, so I don't forget what I've written. Thus far, I have 3 fully accompanied songs written, 2 unaccompanied and 1 that's half written. I should do it now, when I have the opportunity.
-Finish "White Houses"
I've been writing "White Houses", a novel of sorts, for 2 years. It's someone's story, somewhere. I feel like I need to tell it and get it out there so people know.
-Pick a College
(haha)
-Become More Independant
When you are with someone for 1 year, 7 months and 9 days, you forget what it's like to make decisions for ONLY you. Now that I'm back to that, I need to DO it. As difficult as the journey will be, I need to learn how to define myself without someone else's name attatched.
-Find Truth and Be Truthful
We all waste so much time beating around the bush. There is such a lack of authenticity in society- from the fake "Wow, I thought you were sisters" my mother and I get at the grocery store, to the "I'm real sorry about your news about being waitlisted at your dream school- i guess you can come to Eau Claire with me now!" Without sacrificing tact, I want to be honest with people and find truth in my life.
-Serve God
I am having trouble finding friends who believe- I have a lot of agnostic friends, which is ok for them. I respect their choice to live that way. In certain groups I feel uncomfortable talking about my faith, and in others I feel like they expect me to prove my faith. I don't want to feel like I have to prove anything to anyone except God. My relationship with Him is SO personal. I just want to find support- someone to say "Go Get 'Em!" I suppose I can find it in you, unknown reader, and hope that you DO exist. Whoever joins this blog, if someone does, doesn't have to be religious. It's just a goal in my life to be a stronger follower of Jesus Christ- to pray, listen and do what He asks of me. Right now, this is the most important thing in my life.
So that's my list, for now. There will probably be a lot of "note to self" additions to the list along the way, but hopefully, my list won't be the only one. Please, don't leave me hanging here people.
In love-
~Lauren
(In case anyone was wondering, the name of the Blog has an interesting story. It's the name of a story in a book I used to read when I was little - one of the first books that I ever learned how to read. I guess the title fit the purpose of this blog as well as acting as something that has value to me)
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